Paranoid about someone specific reading what I've written

Since your a computer Tech have you been clearing history after you log out?

Just a thought friend & it may be a portion of your symptoms too otherwise she'd probably be mentioning to you what she has been reading that would sound way to familar to what your posting so I wouldnt be too concerned right now.

Hope you feel better.

April

Thanks for your response April. I have the browser set to clear the cache every time the browser is closed which is every time I leave the computer. Maybe it's guilty feelings because I'm writing all these things about her?

Yet its good for you to talk about it & very healthy.

I had to change my name on here because someone who I thought of as a best friend (who i met on a different web site and then in person) who defriended me found my posts on here and got really nasty toward me. Since then I have gotten back to posting freely and don't care if it happens again. No one is going to take this place from me or tell me what I can't post about again.

yeah... I have wondered about that...you don't have to log in to read posts... I don't like that.

I just wrote my first post about this....

I get paranoid my grandma would see it, but i am going to log out when i close down in a few minutes for the night. And I will make sure i remember the website for next time i want to talk. I swear sometimes she goes into my room just to find notes I've written or my journals so she can 'understand what i am going through'. she has done it before, and i got so mad at her, still haven't lived that one down because someone she knows about something i wrote about. It's like she gets bored or something and goes in my room when i am not home and sits on my bed and reads about my life. Now, i use that as my ammo against her, that she is snoppy and bored and has nothing better to do. It's cruel, and i know it, but i don't think she should invade my thoughts like that. I don't do that to her, but then she says "OH I leave my journal out if you look in it a time or two i wouldn't be offended, i write so people know my thoughts after i am gone." Then i always think i am really immature after this.... yep. :) But, i then i think, well this is just me so i keep doing it.

i would have dreaded having friends/family discover and read my thoughts early in my recovery. but now, i've reached a point where they all know quite well my thoughts, so i have nothing to fear. in fact, i relish their questions and comments. helps me clarify and validate the truth. be well.

Excellant Jerry, its difficult but necessary for people to hear things about themselves, good, bad or indifferent, otherwise how else can a person learn from their mistakes.

I have learned (and very recently was reminded) that not everyone can handle hearing negatives about themselves... and that is fine, they are just not at that point in whatever recovery they are going through... it is also not my job to point out other peoples faults even if I do have good intentions. I just need to focus on myself and my own faults and my own contribution to problems and if there is an issue I have with a family member or friend that I need to vent about, hopefully I am talking mostly about my own reactions to it rather than just bitching about someone.

If I am careful to do all of those things and someone reads what I write and still can't handle it or takes it too personally then I need to let that go.

Me and both my parents and both siblings share a computer and I am absolutely terrified they'll find out what I'm doing! Thank goodness they're all deep sleepers.